I know you’re going through a lot. I know it doesn’t make sense. I know it seems like the people around you don’t get it. I know it feels like something is wrong, but you don’t know what it is; and people around you may or may not see it, and even if they do, they’re not sure what it is either. I know because I’ve been there. And you are right:
It will get better, in time.
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Dear everyone else,
IT NEVER GETS BETTER!
We pretend it’s better. But guess what? It’s so totally not.
You don’t even understand, and you never will. What these bullies did to us is irreparable. There is no “getting over it” so stop telling us to do so. Once you learn how to “get over” the death of a loved one, then I’ll “get over” being bullied.
Being bullied rewires the brain. Where you might do something stupid and think, “oh my goodness. I can’t believe I did that. That was so silly. Oh well. Live, laugh, love. Tomorrow is another day….”
Ya… that’s not what it’s like for us.
When we do something even remotely incorrect we EXPECT to be called out for it. We have already created dozens of reasons why that happened, and how it’s not our fault. We wait for people to call us out, or tell us we’re stupid right to our faces. And if they never do? We focus on the idea that they are calling us names behind our backs. Everything we do is being scrutinized by you… in our own heads. Everything we say, every move we make, every breath we take, every song we parody we believe you are watching us. We believe you are judging us. We feel like nothing is ever good enough. We feel like we are not good enough. And we are pretty sure that you do not like us, no matter how nice you are.
And it’s not our fault.
My point is that it never gets better. The bullying stays with us forever.
But, to be fair, we’re not alone. Most everyone has something that sticks with them forever. We all have something, good or bad, that sticks with us. We’re not alone in this, we’re not the only ones dealing with something like this.
And I lied.
It does get better.
It just never goes away.
P.S. – Be kind. Everyone is fighting a battle you know nothing about.
P.P.S. – I don’t know where that quote came from, but it’s not mine. Just to be clear.