Thanos and Hela, NOT sitting in a tree

OK, stupid post today. Stupid in the sense that it really has no meaning in the real world and only matters to a bunch of characters in a fictional universe, and nerds like myself.

I want to talk about Thanos.

Now, I’ll preface this post with this: I don’t read comics. I have read a comic or two, and even read one of the Green Lantern crossovers (I think it was Darkest Night, but I’m not sure). However, I’m not an avid reader. Do you know how much comics cost?

What I am is a fan of superheros. And in the 90’s I was a fan of superhero cartoons. That’s Batman: The Animated Series, Spider-man, X-Men, and a couple more. I also liked the first two Superman Movies (with Christopher Reeves) and the TV show The Adventures of Lois and Clark. So, everything I know about comics comes from those shows and movies.

And of course, these days I know a whole lot more thanks to the MCU and YouTube.

So, this post about Thanos comes from that experience and knowledge.

My thought today?

Thanos is not a “bad guy.”

And, he is not in love with Hela, nor would he ever be.

Let me explain, then you can yell at me.

In the comics, Thanos is a murdering psychopath. He wants to gather the infinity gems to destroy the universe to impress Lady Death, aka Death. From what I can gather sometimes she likes him and sometimes she doesn’t.

In the movie Avengers: Infinity War, Thanos has been trying to fix the universe for a long time. One day, he came up with a plan to save the people of his planet. There’s too many of them. They are starving because supply cannot keep up with demand. And this isn’t iPods, it’s food and clean water and sanitary living conditions. So, his plan is to randomly select citizens to be euthanized. It would be fair, it would be relatively painless, and it would allow the remaining citizens to live a long, happy life. They would probably also take precautions so this wouldn’t happen again.

That’s his plan.

Hela?

In the comics, Hela is the goddess of the dead, ruler of Hel and Niflheim. She is supposed to move souls to the afterlife. She also fights with everyone, apparently. She tries to reign over Valhalla (sort of like Asgardian heaven) from time to time. She’s also somehow Loki’s daughter.

In the movie Thor: Ragnarok, Hela claims herself to be the goddess of death. She is Thor’s sister, which he never knew about because her blood-lust led Odin to banish her. His magic was all that was keeping her captive, but when he dies she escapes. She returns to Asgard to rule as queen. However, she kills everyone who opposes her. She also brings her past army back to life, in a sense, along with her pet giant wolf. She seems to want to rule Asgard but is also OK killing off all the Asgardians for some reason. She is a psychopath in the movies as well as the comics.

Now, having read that, would you assume that Thanos would actually like someone like Hela, much less fall in love with her?

No. Thanos would not fall in love with Hela. If anything, he would despise her. What Thanos is doing is saving people. He just has to kill half the people to save the other half. It’s something that you can tell he doesn’t WANT to do. It’s something be believes that he MUST do, for the good of the universe.

Hela just wants people to bow down and worship her.

But Thanos wants to finish his mission, and then retire to the mountains.

It kind of sounds like… war.

The good guys don’t go attack the bad guys because they WANT to kill people. They go to stop the bad guys. They go to war to make peace.

In a way it’s similar to Ultron’s plan: if there are no people, there are no wars, famine, disasters, hunger, death… albeit, Thanos’s plan allows for the remaining people to make better decisions about their future so they don’t end up with all the suffering again. Which is really the only difference.

So please, stop saying that Hela and Thanos are in love, and that she’s going to be in the next movie and her and Thanos will fight together. I don’t think Thanos will fight along side Hela. I don’t even think he would like Hela.

You can yell at me now.

-Diggs out

P.S. – There’s a lot of stuff I keep hearing people say that just doesn’t make sense. I might write about it, too.

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