So, I’m at work right now…
And I’m not having a very good day, mentally at least. There’s just so much crap that I have to put up with, not the least of which is dealing with teenagers. It is all very frustrating. And the most frustrating part?
Why can’t I just NOT care for once? I’m having a bad day, I’m upset, I’m frustrated with so many things, but I’m still doing my job. I look at the way things were put out, stocked, setup, or made and I think “that’s not right, but I ain’t gonna fix right now because f@ck it I don’t feel like it.” And then I fix it anyway?
Because I just want to do what is right. Even when I’m in a bad mood and I jusy feel like coasting, and letting things slide, and pushing things off to other people I don’t. I HAVE to do what is right. And when I don’t do the right thing I usually feel guilt about it for a very long time.
And this morning, while arguing with imaginary people in my head, I stumbled across something else that just wasn’t right. And I argued with the people in my head about what is right and what is not.
And a thought occurred to me:
I just want to do the right thing, the right way. And there HAS to be A right thing. Or else everyone could decide what is right for THEMSELVES and we’d have no concensus and everybody would just do what they wanted, seeing it as “right” in their eyes.
Isn’t that what we do all the time?
And maybe that’s the thing that frustrates me the most, besides the fact that I work with teenagers, whom could literally do my job (and some are doing the exact same job), and the fact that this is pretty much a dead-end job with no real future beyond what I’ve already achieved… but the frustration on a daily basis comes from the fact that everyone does whatever THEY think is right…
P.S. – I don’t mean to be cruel to these kids, but when the boss says “do it this way” and you do it your own way, you’re an idiot.