My Body, a Temple (of slothiness)

This is an unused YouTube video script. It would have been a part of my vlog series. I hope it can help someone out there, or at least be entertaining.

When I was a young lad I was very much in shape.

Not like, buff, six pack, bench my girlfriend in shape

normal, I don’t pant like a dog on a hot summer day just from walking up the stairs in shape

And as I got older I began to realize that you, like, have to actually work at staying in shape.

like, what the crap is this?!

I never thought you actually have to work at staying in shape

As a kid I was always in shape, and we ate junk food.

But you know what else we did?

We rode our bikes around town

we played outside all day

we played all the sports

we climbed trees

we skinned our knees

we went on camping trips

hiked through the woods

walked uphill both ways in the snow

and very rarely played a nintendo

(that was our parent’s name for literally every video game back then)

But at some point my fast food to exercise ratio tanked

or however ratios work

It took me a few years to figure out, but I soon realized

you can’t eat a ton of junk, sit around the house, and expect to stay fit.

I know most people right about now are saying


But, um, I was too.

I knew you can’t live a sedentary life style and eat fast food twice a day and expect to stay in shape.

That’s why I eat an apple every now and then.

But I never understood how much exercise kids actually get, that they know absolutely nothing about.

Swinging on a swingset really works the abs.

Running while playing tag, soccer, or just chase me is all cardio.

Climbing trees is sort of like a combination pull up and leg press.

Monkey bars or jungle gyms or climby poles are all about arm strength.

Just about every playground, at least back in the day, was essentially a kindergarten version of a 24 Hour Fitness.

But sometime in college I replaced my childhood workout routine with… uh… no routine.

And when I once would go days without moving just to jump back into a soccer game

I will now go minutes without moving to find that I have a cramp and pulled a muscle

Real talk: I once sprained my shoulder putting on a jacket. Not a heavy winter coat. A measly little jacket.

Up until now I’ve been treating my taste buds well

(and my stomach agrees most of the time)

But now, I think it’s time I begin treating my body well.

Now drop and give me 20

yes sir *disappear off screen*


*reaching up from off screen to grab chip bag*

help, I’m a weakling and I can’t… reach… my snacks…

-Diggs out

P.S. – Thanks for reading.

Talk to me. Imma website!

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.