I had a thought while endlessly, mindnumbingly swiping through Instagram Reels. But I’ll talk about that later. Right now I want to posit a hypothetical.

Suppose there is a preacher. A beach preacher. A preacher who preaches on the beaches. A beach preaching preacher. A preacher who

Anyway, this preacher begins sharing the Gospel with people on the beach. He doesn’t really preach TO them as much as he just talks with people. Has conversations with them. Tells them about Jesus; what he’s done for them, how much he loves them, and what he wants them to be. This beach preacher also hands out water, food, and even sunscreen to people who are a little less likely to be able to afford beach supplies… or a house. So, he’s a good guy, you could say. And he’s not only preaching the Gospel but also living it.

The question here is:  should you listen to him? I ask because of that thought I mentioned earlier which I have yet to tell you about. Suffice it to say I’m looking for some sort of authority to whom we can look. Someone who actually has the authority to preach and teach even on the beach. With a Bible in reach he teaches his niche with the simplest of speech. He will only beseech for an ear within reach to sit on the beach and listen to his speech while in the sand will he preach about Jesus.

Anywho, just what do your qualifications need to be to spread the Gospel? If we look back at the Bible the apostles had the ultimate authority: God himself (the person of Jesus the Son). And those apostles were given authority to cast out demons, heal the sick, raise the dead, forgive sins, and preach the good news to all the nations. They, in turn chose others to minister to the people while they continued preaching and teaching. Presumably not on a beach… or maybe they did. They were near the Jordan river and the Medditeranean Sea…

So, it would seem, much like the Catholic church and Orthodox church believes, you need someone who was ordained by the apostles to ordain someone who ordains someone etc etc etc who ordains you. Only then can you teach and preach and speech while eating a peach on the beach if you please.

I’m not going to stop.

Now, let’s change the hypothetical a little bit. Let’s say that this preacher was an ordained minister in a mainstream big “C” Church. So, theoretically he has the authority passed down to him that is necessary to preach the Gospel in a manner that others should listen to him. He has authority to correct people on scriptural concerns, biblical teachings, and the meaning of “Christian” or what it means to follow Jesus.

Just like Martin Luther…

Which brings me to question number 2:  if Martin Luther was an ordained Catholic priest, and thus had authority on matters of Biblical and spiritual significance, then shouldn’t he have been right in telling the Church where they were messing up? If he was able to read the Bible and discern truth, and with the power of the Holy Spirit lead his congregation to Jesus, then wouldn’t he also be able to notice if other church leaders were preaching bad teachings on their respective beachings?

Ok, now I’ll stop.

To say that one man, like our beach preacher, can become weary of church teachings and go on their own path seems like silly baby stuff. Afterall, if a group of ordained leaders who have been ordained for some time, teaching and preaching in churches without a beach in sight, what makes this one guy think that he knows better? How could one guy believe that he has the spiritual fortitude to take on the entirety of church history? How could he possibly believe that HE is the one who knows the actual truth? That he is the only one who knows how to read and decipher the Biblical text? That he has some sort of revelation given to him in order to redirect the entire church which now includes so many denominations and almost as many nondenominational groups?

Except… There’s this guy named Saul…

In the Bible, we read about a guy named Saul who was killing all the Christ followers. He was a super strict, very well educated Jewish rabbi. When it came to understanding the Torah he was one of the best. And when it came to killing christians, well, he was also one of the best. That is until Jesus knocked him off his high horse and literally converted him on the spot. He changed his name to Paul and was sent to the Apostles. He learned from them, employed Luke to write down everything he could, and in a twist of irony ended up being persectuted for preaching the Gospel….

…on a beach

Later on this very same Paul corrected the one and only Peter the apostle of Jesus Christ, the Messaiah, who called him by name and set him as the rock on which the church would be built! Paul corrected Peter. Paul, a christian killer turned Christ follower, corrected Peter, the one ordained by God himself to lead the church. How can that be?

And that’s not some beach preacher or German Catholic priest from the middle ages talking to a group of flawed human beings who not only want authority on Biblical matters but also other worldly things as well. This was a guy coming at the leader of the church who was taught by the God of the church. So, if Paul can be trusted to know what he’s talking about then couldn’t our beach preacher?

If you stop to think about it, especially with the way the world is today, there are many Biblical reasons any layperson could call out their pastoral team, preacher, minister, priest, or bishop. If your church leaders decide that abortion is OK, then you merely need to point them to the verses that say not to kill and where Jesus tells us to care for widows and orphans and love the little children. If your church wants to ordain a homosexual there are plenty of verses in the old and new testament that call homosexual acts and the gay lifestyle a blatant sin. If you want to have a club where you have gay people teaching love and peace then go right ahead. But if you are running a Christian church and claiming to beach preach the Bible, then you cannot have an openly gay minister nor can you perform gay marriages.

So if our beach preacher teaches the Bible and you can look it up in the Bible and say to yourself, “yup, that’s what it says” then maybe he’s reliable. If he lives the way he preaches, giving of himself, only buying or owning what he truly needs, helping others, providing food, drink, shelter, clothing, being kind and loving and giving. Maybe he’s a good guy. Maybe he’s a good Christian. Maybe he’s doing God’s work. Perhaps God is with him?

Next time on the endless reptition of lame jokes hour – What should the structure of the Church look like?

-Diggs out

P.S. – I beseech thee to preach He on the beach ye.