Things Are Coming…

Very interesting things are happening. Watch for interesting things to come. They will be interesting.

“How interesting,” you say?

I guess you’ll never know.

“Then why are you saying there will be interesting things if I’ll never know?”

What? No, I was trying to make a joke.

“Well, it fell flat…”

Sorry *eye roll* I won’t waste your time with humor in the future.

“Thanks. I appreciate that.”

O.o

“Now, what are these ‘exciting things’ that are coming?”

Oh! They are things. That are exciting. And coming.

“…”

What? If I told you right now they wouldn’t be exciting things that are coming, they’d be exciting things that are here. And they definitely are not here yet.

“/:(”

WHAT MORE DO YOU WANT FROM ME!

“:D”

Ok. I just- I- I just don’t know you anymore.

“Pickles!”

… ok, I have to go wash my beard. TTYL (maybe)

-Diggs out

Everything I learned, I learned OUTSIDE of a Classroom…

The title is true. And this is proof.

This is satire, I suppose, but it’s also a bit real. I have this notebook where I jot things down (it is NOT a diary!) and there is a section related to things I learned in school. I haven’t been keeping it for more than a few years, now. So, it’s not full by any means. As I remember or think about where I figured something out, or who taught me, I jot it down.

Things like…

In middle school I learned:

  1. Adults suck
  2. kids suck
  3. people suck
  4. Learn something long enough to get use out of it, then forget it

In college I learned:

  1. The source of my comics was being bored in class in high school
  2. Understanding things isn’t required: just spit back at the teacher whatever they want to hear
  3. How to open a little bag of chips so I don’t get my hands all dirty from reaching inside

See, really important things.

And yes, I understand that I have actually taken a “biology class” many times in my life before college, so I would have a hard time remembering where I learned about cells, reproduction, viruses, and all that biological stuff. I would get it in elementary school, get more of it in middle school, actually be expected to know it in high school, and then be expected to understand it in college. When, exactly, did I learn what a “zygote” is? Who knows.

But here, from Facebook, is a list of more important things I learned growing up. Real lessons that can serve me well in my travels through life… that is, if I become an animated character in a fairy tale.

What I learned from Disney.
March 11, 2010 at 11:15pm
Everyone learned something from Disney over the years.
Here are the things I learned from Disney movies:

Just keep swimming. Just keep swimming. Just keep swimming, swimming, swimming. Cause if you don’t you’ll drown.

Keep moving forward… in time… and try to live with your future family cause your old life sucks.

It’s better to just be me than trade my voice for being a land dweller with a wicked half octopus, half fat lady.

Indians aren’t ignorant savages. Could ignorant savages talk to trees and change history? I think not.

Don’t eat peaches with little glowing, green bugs in them. You’ll turn into claymation.

Never give up, never surrender (was that even Disney?)

If you touch stuff you weren’t told you can touch, the giant tiger made of sand will eat you alive. Hope your monkey grabbed the lamp!

You can be ugly with a big hump on your back, but nobody cares at Mardi Gras… you just ain’t gettin no beads.

You can be goofy and get two movies.

It doesn’t matter where you move to, your pets will find you.

Toys are alive.

After shrinking your kids with a shrink ray, keep the shrink ray and shrink other things. Then, pop that baby in reverse and make things big. The fun never ends!

You don’t have to be a god to be a hero. You just have to be part god with a good goat to train you.

Women can fight in the army. Of course, in China you better save the whole **** city cause aparently the punishment for trying to join the army is death by beheading!

If you let your stuffed bear, rabbit, donkey, pigglet, and rubber tiger loose in the wild, apparently you can be a boy forever.

If you are raised by apes you will actually think you are an ape. Even though you won’t have hair like apes, the vocals like apes, or hands on your feet like apes.

101 dalmations aren’t enough. You need 102.

Make sure you are really moving away from your home town BEFORE you play pranks on everyone in the town.

There really are monsters in your closet. Deal with it.

You can train a ferocious alien to be good if you seclude him on an island with a crazy little girl and play him Elvis music all the time.

Don’t become a pirate.

I can actually get away with stealing the Declaration of Independence if I say it’s a secret treasure map.

There might be distant lands hidden in the back of old people’s wardrobes. There might be…

Cooking is not a science or art, it is a universal language that is so basic even rats can do it.

You really can have the best of both worlds… just not at the same time… and you better invest in some wigs… and your friends need to be VERY understanding…

If I tie millions of balloons to my house I can FLY!

So…………………….
What did you learn from Disney?

Hola

I’m writing this from an iPad. Just playing around…

On an iPad…

At one in the morning.

I’m also listening to Pandora. Country music, Mr. Nosey-pants. Geeze!

That’s about all I needed to say right now. But I’ll be saying more.

Oh,

A lot more.

Bwa ha ha ha!

K. ‘Night!

Diggs out

Everyone Starts Somewhere, Right?

This post will obviously show up where ever these show up for my WordPress followers. But it will also post to my Facebook page and to Twitter. Heck, it will even post to Google+. (that’s still around?!) It will be in enough places that SOMEONE will eventually run into it. I made it soft this time so it won’t hurt. So run like the wind bullseye! However, when I watch all these cool videos on YouTube and read all these fascinating posts on WordPress or [insert blog format here] I get that feeling…

You know the feeling I’m talking about. It’s that feeling you get at Thanksgiving when all of your family is sitting around the table. You look around and contemplate the gene pool from which you’ve arisen. Cousin Billy is getting divorced so he can re-marry his first wife, Uncle Ted just turned 40 and bought a motorcycle because he swears he’s always wanted one, your sister is dating some guy who wears white makeup to make himself look as pale as snow and carries around a locket he got from Zan-bard (the alien overlord who abducted him last Tuesday… for the third time…), Aunt Carrie got a boob job, Mark just bought an underwater house, your brother is getting married to his dog, and your little cousin eats nothing but jelly beans. And you think to yourself,

“We could have our own reality show.”

I have heard no less than 5 people say something to this effect, albeit not about my family. My friend thinks her family could have a reality show. My lunch table in high school told this girl she should become a comedian. (She-comedian? Comediantress? Comedi-Anne?… Lady Laugh Box?… I’ll stick with comedian.) And nowadays, it’s normal for someone to say something like,

“Kick it, bruh! You should totes be on YouTube with that wicked crazy shuff, cray!”

I’m paraphrasing…

So, the “feels” I’m talking about are those strange moments when you’re watching PewDiePie or jacksepticeye play some stupid web game while recording their own reactions, and you think to yourself,

“Wow. All they did was behave like I did when I was 10 years old playing my SNES games. And they have millions of subscribers, and hundreds-of-thousands to millions of views per video… For behaving like a 10 year old. In a video. Online. Wow.”

(I couldn’t think of a funny way to say that. Also, I think I should add that, no, I did not cuss like them when I was 10 years old.)

I am literally left thinking about how me and my friends acted when we were playing video games. You always assume you’re hilarious. But really, when other people get in on the action, you figure out just how lame you are. And you stop. And you grow up. To be a productive member of society. Or a jewel thief. Just be yourself, man.

Yet here are just two examples of grown men (young men, but still legal adults who can, like, drink and stuff…) who sit around and make videos that are akin to my 10 year old self playing Super Mario Kart on the SNES. And they’re not the only ones acting like fools (and doing a lot of cussing) while playing video games and recording the whole ordeal.

Ever heard of Twitch?

My point is that I believe I could do that. And, yes, I believe it would be easy. I have already tried this out many times (not counting 5th grade me) whether it was playing with cousins, or playing a video game with kids at the community center where I work. They all seem to get a kick out of watching me react to the game in crazy ways… or they like watching me suck. But, it’s probably my humorous antics and funny catch-phrases. Although, I am not good at most video games, whatsoever. Except, LEGO video games. I am the bomb at LEGO video games. And, I’m pretty good at Mario games as well. Any side scrolling platformer, really. Have you ever heard of #IDARB? That is a great game. That reminds me: I need to look and see what the free Xbox Live Games with Gold game is this month….. I totally forgot my point…

My point is: if they can do it, I can do it. Because I do it already anyway. But do I really want to do it, or do I just want the fame and recognition, the likes and follows and subscribers? Do I want to do it because I want to do it or because if I do it I could end up with lots of people who “love me?” The little communities these YouTube stars have is nice. I would love one. (I’d probably have to churn out more than one post a quarter, though.) But is the effort worth it?

Actually, to be honest, that’s not the problem. The problem is that I’m (like usual) as scared as a cat taking a nap on the hood of the car right after you honk the horn. (take a moment to picture that. . . . . . now quit ROFL-ing and continue reading) Except, I know the horn is going to honk. Actually, I’m the one who gives the command to honk the horn. So, in essence, I am the one who is responsible for scaring myself… my fears are the horn… maybe. Or maybe the cat is my blogs… NO! Wait, I got it: The fear of the cat is the horn through which I blow it if I don’t get this metaphor tied up nicely… Oh, nevermind.

I guess, like the title of the post says, everyone starts somewhere. If you don’t believe me just look at the “Draw My Life” videos on YouTube. People who have accomplished a lot make a YouTube video in the style of Minute Physics (or whoever started the “draw on a whiteboard for the video instead of using fancy graphics” style). They portray their life in the oily dry erase ink and show where they were and how they got to where they are. And they all started somewhere, that’s for sure. What’s not sure is if there is a somewhere that does not lead to subscribers, followers, likes, and Patrons. Is there a way the whole, “spout off my mouth on YouTube” thing doesn’t work? Or do they all work? Or, do only the ones who make it their “thing they do” and not try too hard to be anything other than themselves end up succeeding?

What is success?

What is life?

Why are we here?

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?

Hershey’s or Nestles?

Coke or Pepsi?

The world is full of important questions like these. However, as with all things, they never get solved by sitting around on the Internet at 1:00 in the morning whining because you don’t have a millions subscribers due to your own laziness.

Digg it?

Diggs out.

(P.S. – I am not sponsored by anyone. Not even Xbox. Even though I did put a weird sentence in where I displayed the name of the Xbox Live Games with Gold program. You know, the one which costs less than $10 a month. You get Xbox Live Gold, Games with Gold which gives you discounts and FREE games each month, and access to other premium content. And I’m talking serious games. Not like crappy indie games no one buys. And you get games for your Xbox 360 AND your Xbox One. The value is immense! Xbox rules! But seriously, I’m not sponsored by Xbox… yet… 😉

(P.P.S. – I seriously have no sponsors. Except Jesus. Shout out to JC! Love ya man! Peace brother.)

(P.P.P.S. – there’s a storm nearby, so if you could all pray that I don’t get struck by lightning, that’d be great.)

Why Can’t We All Just Get Along? I’ll Tell You

Diversity is the number one attribute which makes humans unique and the number one reason why we fight so much.

Think about your social life. Chances are, at one point in time, you were either fighting to fit in or fightng to be different. There’s a problem with this. The problem lies in the collective. While you were trying to fit in there was undoubtedly someone trying to fit you in, someone letting you do whatever you want, and someone trying to make you unique. The people trying to fit you in are working against diversity; they are trying to make you a copy of the in crowd. The more people who are alike, the less diversity. The person trying to make you unique is probably working against diversity as well, they just don’t realize it. They may be trying to help you become genuinely unique. Or, they may be trying to make you the opposite of the in crowd; what they consider unique. The latter is what troubles me.

There are groups of people all over the globe who want you to be like them. There’s Christians, Jews, and Muslims. There’s Democrats and Republicans. There’s Conservatives and Liberals. There’s those for the death penalty and those against it. It really doesn’t matter what side you’re on, there’s two things you wish: that those on the other side would join your cause, and that those on your side whom you don’t like would switch sides. But if everyone wants everyone to join their side, their cause, their viewpoints just what happens to diversity?

We could look at diversity and define it with physical attributes and subjective opinions. For example, the school where I work has a student body consisting of mostly white students. We do have some students of different ethnic and racial backgrounds. However, our diversity level is very low compared to the public middle school. They have students of many races and ethnic backgrounds. They are diverse, right? Perhaps diversity is not simply about race. It is also about a wide availability of different activities. My school does not have a diverse sports program, at least not compared to the public school. We also don’t have a lot of clubs or other chances for our students to delve into activities, sudo-sports, outreach programs, or other interests. So, our list of extracurricular activies is not diverse; compared to the public school.

But what about fashion? Attitude? Morals? Ethics? If all the Conservatives want everyone to be Conservative, that means they want people to adopt their morals or beliefs about the world economy, environmental issues, political views, and whatever they consider to be social reform. But if everyone was conservative, there would be no diversity in these areas. Everyone would agree on the laws and there would be no discussion about laws and whether they are constitutional or how to spell out the law or what happens if you break the law. We’d all be like the community in the book “The Giver.”

In “The Giver” the community is all about sameness. Emotions have been stripped from the world. Death, starvation, suffering, and all things negative have also been stripped from the world. But at what cost? Genuine happiness, joy, and love have also been stripped from the world. Everyone is compliant. Everyone does what they’re told. It sounds nice, until you think, “what if a child wants to become a scientist instead of a birth mother; what happened to the people who enjoyed dancing or playing music; how did the council get rid of those who opposed sameness?”

Diversity is awesome! If life was not diverse, we wouldn’t have all the plants and animals we have. If life was not diverse, what do you think would happen to our creativity? Think of all the entertainers and speakers you ever saw in school. Think of all the field trips you went on in school. Chances are, something like that caused you to become interested in one field or another and eventually pursue a career of your own choosing. No diversity, no long list of careers. Just the short list that the people in charge deem necessary. Diversity allows us to grow and change because we are learning new things. Celebrating diversity encourages children to grow as persons as well as productive members of society. Or not.

Some people actively take a stand against diversity. They want children to fall into a category they can understand. They want people to be compliant. We should all follow the law – and if we don’t agree with the law, we should work within the legal system to get it changed. But we shouldn’t be forced to do something we don’t want to do. We should be free to be who we want to be. We should be free to do what we want. And for the most part (in the USA, anyway) we are.

And that’s why we can’t get along. The USA is a free nation or free thinkers doing whatever they desire. Other nations or groups are far less open to free thinkers. Even people in America have tussles with each other. We are free to think for ourselves – free to be diverse – and this causes us to think different from one another. These differences are often not tolerated, especially when it seems to interfere with our own freedoms, or if it looks like something which will impact children. So people fight over this. There’s also those who wish to prove themselves, those who think they’re better than others, and those who just can’t stand by and watch things play out they way they are anymore. So, we fight. It’s as simple as tolerance, but not quite. Why can’t we all just get along? Because we’re all human.

Let Me Tell You Something About Florida

I obviously had a point to make, but I never posted this. Probably because I never finished writing the post. However, it’s an interesting thing to read still. I wonder about where I was going. What was my point? Did I even have a point? It seems to be just another rant about something, but about what? Florida, as I remember it, was really no different than Illinois. It was just warmer, and near a beach. The people were basically the same, laws are the same, neighborhoods are the same. There really was no difference between my friend’s new home in Florida and my home in Illinois. I think the thing I wanted to write was how ordinary it was. Mix that with my other reasons for staying in my current home town (specifically, the people I know at home) and you can see why I came to the conclusion I did. The last few lines below also make it seem like I thought people thought I was actually going to move. Almost like I should apologize for making them think I was moving away forever, which apparently I never was. I suppose it’s nice to know you’re needed and claiming to want to move to Florida for good and never come back gets people thinking about what it would be like to not have you around. It’s incredibly selfish, I know. But we all do it. I just made it fairly more dramatic than saying I’m going to quit my job, “good luck finding an employee as great as me!” Anyway, I saw this draft, wanted to comment on it and post it, so here it is. Remember, I wrote this in January (2015) in Florida. Oh and one more thing: I’m pretty sure I was incredibly home sick by the time I wrote this.

I have been spending my Christmas vacation in Florida. A full 21 days. It’s not my first time in Florida. I visited Florida once to look at a film school. I came down with a couple of friends and my parents. We met up with some friends of my friends and went to Sea World. It was fun.

This time around, I haven’t done much. I’ve gone to the beach a few times. I’ve taken a few drives around town and even did some walking. I’ve been staying at a friend’s house, and we’ve gone to some of her friends’ houses to hang out. Besides that, though, I haven’t done much. It’s not really been a typical vacation. But then again, it wasn’t supposed to be.

This vacation of mine was supposed to be about getting away from it all. It was supposed to be about no responsibilities. It was supposed to be about exploring, relaxing, doing some walking, and hanging out with my friend. And that’s exactly what it was. It was fun.

Normally you spend a few days, or maybe a whole week on vacation. At the end, you’re either ready to get back to home, or you don’t want to leave. Most kids don’t want to leave. Most parents want to get back home, where they can hire a babysitter.  🙂  I think about all of the vacations I’ve taken and the end of the vacation has always been the same. Part of me has wanted to stay, and part of me has wanted to get back to my own comfy bed. The trend I’ve seen is the less time on vacation the more you want to stay. And I now know that the longer time you spend on vacation the more you just want to go home.

I have a confession to make. I was never going to move to Florida. Honestly, I was never going to go to film school in Florida, and I’m not moving to Florida now.

Opposites Revolt Me

I guess I’m at that time in my life. Of course, it could be caused by the fact that I work with teens. Oh, ya. What am I talking about…

I hate people. Ok, I severely dislike human beings and their nature. Here’s what irks me today: I want to teach my students to be good, kind, trustworthy, loving people. However, the world is teaching them to be selfish, greedy, and worry only about themselves. The world wants these kids to treat other people like crap and then laugh about it. The world is teaching these kids that authority figures are stupid and they don’t have to respect anyone, much less adults.

I feel as if I tell them to act like a good person and they look at me the same way kids looked at me when I was a kid. They act like I’m being prude, or a goody-goody, or lame, or square. And while I’m not particularly worried about what they think of me, I do worry about how they will continue to act in the future. I could act appropriately, teach with my words and lead by example, but it feels as if they just don’t get it. They are determined to be rude, disrespectful, and perverted people.

Perhaps this is just children. Which is why I thought it might just be that I am at that time in my life. Instead of having kids at the age of 27, and then dealing with their teenage versions 13 years from now, I am dealing with 120 different middle schoolers at the same time; most of whom are acting or beginning to act more and more perverse, rude, etc. So, it’s probably just hitting me harder. I am trying to teach these kids respect and love among all else and I don’t see it in return. So, naturally, I just assume they’re not picking it up, meaning I’m not getting through to them. But I’m not a bad teacher…. am I?

Leading by example is hard. I guess (because I’ve been told this before) I’ll never really know what kind of impact I’ve had on a child’s life until I see them at the supermarket with their own kid one of these days…